My least favorite thing is straight men who come into lush and act like it’s a direct attack on their manhood coming up to me like “I’m in here for my girlfriend” ok thanks for confirming your heterosexuality everyone who likes soap is usually gay
you know how sometimes you feel your phone vibrating even though it’s not what if that is the echo of a parallel universe in which someone who was debating whether or not to contact you went through with it
what’s really amazing to me is that people are so afraid of body hair on women that even in a shaving commercial they won’t show a hairy leg. they demonstrate the razor by shaving a hairless leg. they show their product being completely useless instead of showing leg hair. it’s just wild
let’s talk about the universe and make out
me: *comes out of room*
parents: oh! lord have mercy! she came out of her cave!